When white western men condemn muslim men for misogyny, they’re not doing it because they give a fuck about women, because if they did they’d start by addressing the sexism they perpetuate personally. They don’t give a fuck about women, they want an excuse to be racist.
They also do it to deflect the attention away from themselves
*inspirational post by a woman for women*
"and don’t forget that the same goes for men"
shut the fuck up
So last week me and my friend were trying out a faceswap app
And for some reason it wouldn’t recognise that there were 2 faces in the picture
So we tried it from a different angle and
I was really confused and kind of offended at what it’d done to my face
NOT A DAY PASSES WHEN I DON’T LAUGH AT THIS
Laughing too hard at this.
Beware of The Blob! In this talk from TEDxToulouse, biologist Audrey Dussutour uncovers the mystery of myxomycota — a.k.a. le blob — the fascinating blob organism whose unicellular structure betrays a surprising personality.
I didn’t know slime molds consumed mushrooms!
It’s a misconception that they’re one big cell, though. People here that they’re “single celled organisms” and assume that means the whole plasmodium.
The mass is actually made of millions of individuals. It’s a colony OF single-celled organisms! Amoeba forming a bigger amoeba!
This is illuminating. Really. As someone who’s played tons of classic (read: 1990s) RPGs and encountered “slime molds” and “slime blobs” in dungeons, I used to think that was way unrealistic. How in the world would the damn thing be able to follow you in a dungeon, I thought. Oh, how little did I know how formidable these blobs were.
Ice Cream Van
INT KITCHEN DAY
A boy - (about 5) - sits at kitchen table in foreground eating beans on toast. A younger boy - a toddler (2) - stands on a long cardboard box in the background, smiling at the camera and eating some kind of toaster pastry.
They eat in silence.
The toddler takes a step forward, his loses his footing on the edge of the box and collapses. He lies still, phased but unhurt.
Haha. Oh gosh.
SFX: Ice Cream Truck Music begins - the tune of “Yankee Doodle”
The Ice Cream-!
He trips getting out of his seat with a crash, holding his baked beans on toast aloft, and lands next to a soccer ball.
Hahahahah. [F**k.] OH MY GO-
I’ve watched this more than 25 times in the past hour.
Why? This video, I propose, is an alignment of the universe resulting in perfect comedy, and - moreover - wonderment.
I want to address the thing that I think really sends this funny video into the stratosphere of tragicomedy and that is the camera person. I initially assumed this third person was the mother of the children, but after repeat viewing, I think the voice sounds more like that of a pubescent boy. Let’s assume he is babysitting his two younger brothers. He’s made them snack. Pocket pastry for the toddler, baked beans on toast for the 5 year old. Now he’s got nothing to do, so he turns on his camera (BTW the quality of this video is very high). For sixteen seconds the two boys eat happily. The toddler stares and smiles into the camera as the other crunches into his beans on toast and wipes his nose.
At the sixteenth second the toddler steps forward, off of the cardboard box he was perched on and he rolls his ankle beneath him. He topples over without any attempt to brace himself and lays on his side with one of his legs floating above the other. He truly seems not to mind this sudden rearrangement. Standing, lying prone, it’s all the same to him.
The baked bean brother is completely unaware of the unintentional bit of hilarity behind him and continues eating until at second eighteen the first notes of “Yankee Doodle” can be heard, presumably played by a passing ice cream truck.
The boy lights up and with a voice made viscous and gravelly from baked beans on toast he announces “The Ice Cream-!!!!!” Before he can finish he, too, topples off his chair with a satisfying crashing sound. In the background the youngest brother has gotten to his feet. Baked Bean Brother lies next to a soccer ball. And realizing what happened begins to wail.
This is at second 22. A mere 4 seconds after his brother’s fall and only 2 seconds after hearing “Yankee Doodle.”
The cameraperson - our surrogate - breathes the F word (I think) then begins to laugh. And then, for me, what is the icing on the cake moment of the video occurs:
Like a sonic boom after a jet plane, the reality of what has just happened AND what he has just captured on film catches up to the babysitting brother. He shouts “OH MY GO-” and the video stops.
Just twenty seven seconds. Sixteen of which are just kids eating snack.
Within the babysitting brothers “OH MY GO-” is everything that makes humans human. Shock at the events that had just occurred. Joy at witnessing it. Disbelief that he had captured it. And, I propose, a deeper recognition at the massive invisible machinations that some think of as the wheel of fortune, or fate, or karma.
Yes this video is twenty seven seconds long. It could have been only eleven. But what truly is the first event of this video? The toddler falling? The sound of the crunching of Toast? The moment the camera is turned on?
What about the unseen events? The placement of the long thin cardboard box on the kitchen floor. It seems like an Ikea HEMNES Shelf box, What about the recognition within the household that a new shelve was required? Or the purchasing of items that would lead to this storage impasse? You see where I am going - to the meeting of the parents of these children and their decision to begin and continue a family, the health of these babies, and the doctors and nurses that assisted them along the way etc. etc.
Furthermore: external to the events within their home, we have the wildcard of the ice cream truck driver. How long had he been driving that day, what events led him to turn on his music exactly two seconds after the toddler’s funny fall?
All of these possibilities and potentialities pass through the oldest brothers mind and he breathes the word “Fuck.” The “Fuck” moment is the exact moment this boy’s eyes are opened to the infinite magnitude of the world. He says “Fuck” to himself, but then he appeals to the universe, realizing his tiny tiny spot in it, and realizing too, how lucky he was to occupy his own tiny spot: a hearty “OH MY GO-“
Incidentally, this exclamation really puts an excellent button on the video. It cuts out at the moment of maximum energy. He is the only one who has seen all of the events and they slam into him with the force of an ice cream van.
When the tape ends, I imagine the babysitting brother setting down the camera. He checks on his fallen weeping brother. He hugs him. He helps him up. Maybe he soothes him by taking both brothers’ hands and walking outside to purchase some ice cream. He was going to spend the money on something else, does it even matter what, now? “Two Drumsticks, please,” he says. The baked beans on toast brothers wipes his eyes, and then his snotty and beany mouth. Back inside, the younger boys sit on the floor in the playroom, housing their Drumsticks. While in the kitchen the older boy cleans the beaked beans on toast off the floor. He sits at the kitchen table. He texts a girl he likes.
This is a very special time and maybe no one knows it. A great internet treasure lays waiting in his camera, like a killer shark at the bottom of the ocean. The young boys have forgotten by now - and were oblivious, anyway - to the gift they will give to the world. The older boy was distracted by his duties as caretaker.
Now he thinks. He sets down his smartphone and looks at the camera sitting across from him. The camera stares blankly ahead. He picks it up. He presses play. He watches it again. And again. He laughs. He puts his hand on his mouth. He finds the USB cord. He goes to the computer, sits down, and connects us with the fingerprint of the universe.
The woman on the left is a mother from Miami who was so desperate to feed her hungry family that she was trying to steal a lot of food.
The woman on the right is Miami-Dade County Police Officer Vicki Thomas. Officer Thomas was about to arrest Jessica Robles but changed her mind at the last minute.
Instead of arresting her, she bought Robles $100 worth of groceries:
“I made the decision to buy her some groceries because arresting her wasn’t going to solve the problem with her children being hungry.”
And there’s no denying they were hungry. Robles’ 12 year old daughter started crying when she told local TV station WSVN about how dire their situation was:
“[It’s] not fun to see my brother in the dirt hungry, asking for food, and we have to tell him, ‘There is nothing here.’”
Officer Thomas says she has no question that what she did was right:
“To see them go through the bags when we brought them in, it was like Christmas. That $100 to me was worth it.”
But Officer Thomas did have one request:
“The only thing I asked of her is, when she gets on her feet, that she help someone else out. And she said she would.”
And guess what? The story gets even better.
After word got out about what happened people donated another $700 for Jessica Robles to spend at the grocery store.
And then best of all a local business owner invited her in for an interview and ended up hiring her on the spot as a customer service rep.
She started crying when he told her:
“There’s no words how grateful I am that you took your time and helped somebody out. Especially somebody like me.”
And to think it all started with one veteran police officer trusting her “instinct” instead of going “by the book”.finally some good news to read
I thought this would be another frustrating article about the government messing up people’s lives but this was pleasantly different
"Here’s how the rings work, in a nutshell. There are three detatchable rings that are worn on the the thumb and first two fingers of each hand, as well as a bracelet. As the user signs out whatever they want to say, the translation is then spoken through a digitized voice that comes from the bracelet. I’m not sure if it works real time or not, but that’s still some pretty amazing stuff. And that’s not all…
"The gesture-to-speak aspect works fine when the hearing-impaired person wants to talk to someone else, but what about vice versa? The bracelet carries the double duty of turning sound into text that runs across an LED display. It seems like the only thing these guys have left to do is actually make people hear again…"
Is there a Webby for ‘Best Dummy Data’?
A sneak peak at an exciting new ImprovCoaches feature.
EDIT: Using ‘exciting’ real loose here folks
I have data for you!
This is VERY exciting to me, actually! Oh thank you so much.
This is better than the Google Doc I tried to share with everyone!